1.31.2008

BITCH, fuck off.

i just need to let that out of my chest. it's been an infuriating two days for me.

thanks to my friends. i can't thank you enough girls.

once again, to the bitch with the capital B who is never worth a second of anyone's time, FUCK OFF!

1.28.2008

an open-letter to Ate Donna

Dear Ate Donna,

Happy 24th Birthday! never ko pa naexperience na magcelebrate ng birthday na malayo sa pamilya ko, sa inyo, so i honestly don't know how you are feeling right now. it must be very hard and lonely too. palagi ko sinasabi na miss na miss na kita, i mean it with all my heart! palagi ka namin pinagkukwentuhan ni Day. though andito naman si Ate Mae at si Ate Lhet, iba pa din noong nandito ka. namimiss na namin 'yung mga kuwento mo at mga pieces of advice. namimiss namin yung panonood natin ng DVD kapag weekends. hindi na din ako naeengganyo mag-jogging kase hindi na kita kasama. namimiss ko yung pangangapit-bahay ko sa inyo sa umaga kahit di pa ko nakakapag-toothbrush para lang hanapin ka. kahit ata tumanda na kami ni Day, we will always be the same little girls who look up to our ates. kahit sabihin na you are just an email and text away, iba pa din eh. i know you have your own reasons kaya ka umalis. talaga lang miss na miss ka na namin!

i wish na sana maovercome mo na lahat ng lungkot at lahat ng bumabagabag sa'yo. sana makatagpo ka ng mga friends diyan who would make you feel like you're home. magpayaman ka na kaagad para makauwi ka na ah. i love you! you are always in my prayers. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!:)



Love,

Sharot

1.23.2008

greatest fear

*i am terrified of getting sick.
*i am afraid of frogs.
*i am panicky of insects.
*i dread death.
*i am scared of lightnings
*I FEAR NOT BEING ENOUGH.

one quiet night, i was watching an episode of One Tree Hill when the words of the gorgeous highschool cheerleader Brooke Davis who seems to have everything at her beck and call struck me like a thunderbolt. "I am scared of not being enough."

that was one thing i never knew i was afraid of. not until i heard the stupefying words. to be insufficient. to be not enough. to be dumped for somebody else. to be left alone and hurting by someone i love dearly.

i wish to find the one who will hold my hand and assure me that lightning will not strike.
:who will teach me to stare straight at the eyes of death.
:who will crush insects for me.
:who will never ever turn into a frog.
:who will stay at my side when i am sick.
the one who will make me feel that i am more than enough for him despite my fears and shortcomings.

only then will i fear my fears no more.
:)

1.20.2008

the signs

i think i'm feeling the signs again.
good thing, bad thing, right, wrong, i am not sure.
what's good though is the fact that i am having real feelings again.
i am starting to feel alive again.
yeah, i know i'm talking in riddles.
i myself do not have names for these feelings.
none yet.

1.18.2008

best wishes

another cousin is getting married tomorrow. i don't know if it's a huhu or a hurrah. mixed emotions. it's all happening a little too sudden. first i found out they are having a baby, the next moment they're getting married. it was just like yesterday when i am playing bahay-bahayan, siato and barog with all of my cousins, now they are starting a whole different life! they can no longer play bahay-bahayan because it's now for real, not a joke, definitely not a game.

it only means that: life is moving on and we are getting old, i am getting old!

don't get me wrong, i am happy for them, for as long as they're happy! i am actually excited about the thought of welcoming 2 other members to the family of Rodils, the little angel in the womb included. stay healthy honey! tita is looking forward to meeting you already.

:)

1.12.2008

the first man in my life

nah-ah. it's not what you think it is. i am still very single, very available and soooo searching!haha. the first man in my life? he is short. going bald. has a belly as huge as Santa's. and he turns 48 today! sounds like i have a DOM huh? i sure do! for those who still can't guess who my Dazzling Oh-so-Mabait man is, the first man in my life is no other than my daddy, my PAPA! yihaaaa!


HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you!


my only present for him (for mom and for myself as well) was a Sansrival cake which is now sitting in the fridge one-eighth of its original size. i did not write him a card because it has always been my style. nakakaumay na!haha. aside from the fact that i did not have time to buy one.

so what do people need to know about my PAPA?
the basics:
~ he is the 3rd child of his parents who happen to be my lolo and lola. (how informative!)
~ he is the husband of my mom. (believe it or not)
~ he is the father of my sister and i. (really?????!)

enough of my stupid jokes! (oh i probably got this trait of mine from him. )

more about Papa:
~ he loves cracking jokes.
~ he cooks good food.
~ he makes the yummiest Milo drink.
~ he snores oh-so-very loudly!
~ he loves watching boxing and basketball.
~ he loves Jackie Chan.
~ he got a wonderful voice.
~ he can wash and press clothes, do the dishes, clean the house and do other stuffs that we are so tamad to do.
~ he is an awesome friend.
~ he is a caring son.
~ he is a loving husband.
~ he is God's faithful servant.
~ he is everything you could ask for in a DAD!


at your 48th birthday, i would like to thank you for the 18 years, 8 months and 23 days you've been present in my life. thank you for the unconditional love and concern and for the patience as lengthy as the San Juanico Bridge! you are one great father and you will forever be the most beautiful man in my life. thank you for making me believe that in this world there exists a man as wonderful as you are. i hope to find another Bienvenido Rodil! I Love You Papa! may you have more more more birthdays to come! God bless you and our family.
:)

1.09.2008

home on a Tuesday!

we have no classes tomorrow because tomorrow, today rather, is Araw ng Nazareno. that's why i'm home on a tuesday instead of friday night. i am bone-tired at this moment but sleeping is a little impossible after i have finished off two cups of coffee while waiting for my parents to rescue me at the convenience store. the last jeepney on the terminal had already departed so i have no other safe option but to wait patiently for dear parents to arrive from a CFC activity. so unlikely of me to wait but believe it or not, i have patiently endured it for an hour and a half. i am not really a coffee person but i coffeed anyway because i'm afraid i am gonna doze off right in front of the 7-ll crew's very eyes. that's a little embarrassing i guess. :)

it's already the 9th of the month but still i will mention my greetings of a happy birthday to the following people:

BEA - (my college friend) i wish you had a blast!

KUYA HAR - (my cousin) hope you are not too drunk.

FRANCIS - (a highschool classmate) God bless!

:)

1.01.2008

New Year's ReVolutions

"Revolution" was the term used by our parish priest on his homily with yesterday's mass. i thought it was just one of his jokes, to play with the words, thinking that the s was just replaced with the v. it was only after a short while did i get his meaning by new year's revolutions.

when one says resolutions, these are his intentions to reverse his bad habits or ways of previous years (e.g i will try to lessen my smoking.). but when one says revolution, and i take it this was what my favorite priest implied with his homily, it is a complete turnaround from one's bad habits. it is not just an intention to change, but a conviction. (e.g. i will not smoke anymore.)

while i think i have clearly explained the difference between the two, i would like to make my own list of reSolutions. the other term, though i would love to use, is too strict for me. i am not exactly a promise-breaker, guess i am just cautious with making my vows.

i will TRY:

1. not to shout my words when mama can not hear me

2. not to mess up my room anymore (i still don't promise to clean it myself..heeeheee)

3. to reply at important text messages when i have load

4. not to come late during mass

5. to be more patient and more godmotherly with James

6. to shave my legs regularly

7. to stick with my 'apple a day' routine

8. to lessen my consumption of sweets

9. to jog again during weekends

10. to pray before dozing off


it would be good to fulfill these resolutions. these may not seem to be a real about-face from my unsatisfactory habits, but at least i can say that i am a better person after the accomplishment of the things above. as they say it, do things one at a time.
Happy New Year!:)

2007 year-end letter

note: this is not the original copy.. hehe

hello! it's a little before eleven in the evening at this moment. i think it's the best time to write my 2007 year-end letter, which is my little tradition for 3 years now.

to start with, i would like to thank in this letter the people who played a sginificant part in my life all throughout the year: Ate, Mama, Papa, Day, Chiq, Michy, Ja, Hya, Bea, Ate Iz, Ate Lala, Ace, Nani, Yel, Carla, Kepong, Keng2, Ganda, Beybi, Ria, Allen, the rest of 3ECO, Nanay Saning, Ate Lhet, Ate Donna (miss na miss na namin!), Gladys, Nay Rely, Uncle Pertz, Kuya Gapz, James, Ta Me, Justine, Jewell, Kuya Irving, Uncle Sam, Ninang Lorns, Kuya Har, Aaron, Justine A., Jondell, Ate Elsey, Ate Chi2, Ate Jelaine, Alison, Audrey, Auntie Janet and the list goes on!

significant moments of 2007:
~i have successfully finished my 2nd year in college.
~i was offered the Team Head position for YFC Lumampong, which I hesitantly accepted.
~i started third year which i find very stressful.
~i started blogging.
~Ate Lhet & Kuya Bi got married.
~Ate Donna left for Singapore.
~i . . . can't think of anything else.

i would like to thank the Lord for the whole year that He stayed by my side. at some moments at least, i think i've made Him proud of me. there were times when He wanted to slap the back of my head, yet He never did. He loved me for everything i have and not done. and for that i am deeply grateful. on the other hand, i am terribly sorry for the times i let my stupidity rule over me. sorry if i've prayed less. sorry for cursing and for being stubborn. sorry if i've been mean to people and disrespectful too. even before i have admitted to my sins, i know You have already forgiven me.

i hope to do better this year 2008. my wishes will be the same:
:may my family stay bonded and in good health;
:may my friends remain my friends;
:a lot for myself which i prefer to keep within;
:may You grant Ate Lhet & Kuya Bi a healthy baby;
:a clean bill of health for Nanay Saning;
:more blessings for my bestfriends Day,Chiq&Michy;
:guidance for Ate Donna;
:and more!;

it was in year 2007 when i realized what i really want to do with my life, more likely after college: cook, write and sing.

again, i want to thank the Lord for everything and everyone who crossed my life, for every second of it, THANKS! i hope i made a difference in the lives of some people too.

no predictions for this year!
i love You Lord.

*hugs and love*
SHASHI, signing off for year 2007
December 31, 11:36 pm