frankie

Dear Frank,

You can never imagine how wide my smile was when I got the news that classes in MM will be suspended today. It was a wish granted two weeks late, but granted still. Two weeks ago I wished that start of classes be moved, you see. It wasn't moved but you made it possible to extend the vacation I so longed for.

There are complications though. While I am enjoying my extended vacation, there are people who are trying to salvage what's left of their stuffs that have already been flooded. A farmer is worrying right now because you are ruining the crops that is his and his family's only source of meager income. A man is lying awake right at this moment wondering how long his roof could last the furious winds. And in case you hadn't realized yet, there are families who are in deep suffering, wondering if their loved-ones had survived in the vast seas.

So please, can you keep it subtle? I mean don't let people get hurt. Don't hurt them. Don't blow their roofs away. Don't flood their houses and crops. Don't make more boats and ships sink. Just don't do anything that would cost a life. It's not fair.

I am a bit lost

These past few days, I don't know what has been happening to me. Everything looks boring to me. Things I enjoy doing means nothing at the moment. I feel too lazy and so bored to walk, to talk, to cook, to read, to sing, to write, to clean the house (this one's understandable), to think, to smile, to crack a joke. This entry I decided to write, in hope that I could trace the roots of my sudden feeling of boredom, of nothingness. In hope that while I am pressing letter keys, space bar, enter enter to express how I feel, something would spill out of my subconscious and I would finally know what's been bothering me. I think bothering is not the right word. Because nothing is bothering me except the fact that I am not bothered by anything at all. That doesn't seem normal, to me at least.

Let me try. These past few days, nothing extraordinary happened to me. I attended my classes. I read what we were assigned to read in class. I ate my meals. I talked and laughed with friends. I walked home after classes. I slept soundly. Everything seems to be fine and normal.

So why am I suddenly feeling a bit lost in my little uncomplicated world? After rambling and ranting, I failed to answer my question. Well, if I failed in doing so, maybe I could suggest a few solutions to my own problem (problem? wrong word, but this will do).

Possible solutions to the problem which is not at all a problem:
1. Have a haircut. Do it myself.
2. Read the research paper we were assigned to read. It's like a lullaby.
3. Bang my head to the wall.
4. Have a cold shower. (Let's cross this one out.)
5. Open the fridge and stuff my stomach with anything I would get.
6. Chat with sex-deprived maniacs on the internet.
7. Pick my nose.
8. Run outside in the rain and see if I'll get wet.
9. Smell my stinking shoe.
10. Put my finger to the door frame, then close the door abruptly.

Maybe I really need to do something crazy. Something that would get my mind out of my boredom. Something that is out of normal bounds. Then maybe I'll find my way back to normalcy, to the normal ME.

Forgive me for being such a rotten company tonight. Things look brighter in the morning, so they say. I'll try to catch some sleep. Thanks for not complaining about my endless nonsense ramblings.


xoxo,
i actually don't know

I

I'm not the easiest person to love.

I realized that now.

You see,

I can be very stubborn at times.

I bore people with my boring stories and corny jokes.

Taking a bath is not my most favorite thing to do.

I sometimes have my own world.
I can be brutally and unthinkingly honest, and rude.
I curse a lot.
I have quite a temper.
I am papansin.
I can be irritatingly persistent at times.

I may be a lot of bad things. I don't know and care what impression I imprint in people's minds.


I'm not the easiest person to love.
But not the most difficult either.

umaapela po ako!

Super Valid Reasons kung bakit hindi pa dapat bukas ang pasukan at kung bakit dapat ma-move ito sa June 16:

1. wala pa akong notebooks, pens, yellow paper at kung anik-anik pang pambala sa pagpasok!
2. hindi pa plantsado ang mga uniform ko.
3. maglilipat pa ko sa bagong kwarto sa dorm (that's a lot of work! madaming gamit ang kailangang hakutin.)
4. may kailangan pa kong tapusin na mga dvds. (aba naman!)
5. feast of St. Anthony sa Friday at kailangan kong tumulong sa mga preparations sa bahay.
6. uulan ata ng malakas with rainshowers and thunderstorms (nagtext si Ka Ernie from up above)
7. nakaburol pa si Daboy.
8. hindi pa ko marunong gumising ng mas maaga sa 9:00.
9. basta hindi pa dapat magpasukan!
10. dahil hindi pa ko readyyyyyyyyyyy! waaaaaaaah!

Sa aming Rector at sa university administration, please reconsider. Thank you po!

xoxo,
SHASHI

mom

Before the 8th of June officially ends, I would like to greet the woman who is responsible for my pretty looks and million-dollar smile (Uyeah, she is to blame for all that!). The woman who has so much love to give and plenty of kindness to share, my mom.

HAPPY 49TH BIRTHDAY MAMA!

We love you so much! :)

today

I was standing in a gymnasium full of people, singing His praises, with my eyes closed and my hands at my left chest, feeling the beat of my heart. From where I stand, the future and life in general, looks unclear, but before that moment, I have never been that confident that I would be able to get past through every single hurdle that'll be standing along my journey.

I was standing in a roomful of people, some I know, mostly I don't. I just knew that we all have this common friend. It was real hot inside and I felt sweat dripping down my back, my underarms and my forehead. Yet when I closed my eyes, I felt at peace with the world. I felt so confident about everything in my life; and from where I was standing, things make sense, my life has meaning.

That was a very priceless 15 minutes, magical indeed. The band was hitting so loud. Someone was standing in the middle of our circle, speaking about something I could not hear but I understood his heart, and I know the rest of us also did. I am just so thankful that this common friend brought all of us there together. Today is a wonderful day.